Wow, so I'm on week 4 of being a "stay at home Kayla," and I still have all of my hair and haven't lost my mind yet. I think that's really saying something. It really hasn't been as bad as I thought it would be. I do get frustrated and bored at times, but I've really only had 2 "bad" days so far, where I bummed on the couch in sweats all day and was crabby. Other than those days, I have gotten up early each day and been productive. The job market is kind of crappy right now, but I'm trying to stay optimistic. Adam has been so supportive about me finding a job and not rushing into something I don't want to do (like medical sw, ick), but I hate the idea of being home for so long. We shall see how much longer I last!
I have started reviewing for my LCSW exam so I can apply for my license. I don't think I will be eligible to take the exam until the beginning of March because it takes them forever to process my degree and all that. I should definitely be ready to go by then because most of the info on the exam is stuff I have been doing for the last 4 years! Still, I will definitely be nervous to actually take the test.
The only drama that really sucks is my jaw. Ever since it popped out of place in September, it has been getting progressively more painful. I think around November is when it started to be unbearable and I decided to see a specialist. Of course the surgeon/specialist decided I needed surgery because I have exhausted all other resources to make it better, but our insurance refuses to pay for ANY services related to my TMJ. It has been such a frustrating couple of months dealing with all of this, particularly because i am in pain all of the time. I'm kind of proud of myself that I only had 1 minor breakdown day and have been optimistic/friendly otherwise. I guess we will do an in-office procedure to see if it will help since we can't afford the surgery without insurance. I will try to remain optimistic about this drama because my mood has been pretty good overall and I would like it stay that way!
Ok, time to be productive today. I might actually work on the wedding scrapbooks today! I will to be better about updating my blog as well.
Tuesday, January 18, 2011
Friday, November 19, 2010
What is your occupation right now? Therapist
What color are your socks right now? Pink with green bunnies that say "it's not my fault you're icky"
What are you listening to right now? National Treasure on TBS and Adam sleeping on the couch
What was the last thing that you ate? Rice and eggs (though I really want some candy)
Can you drive a stick shift? Not real well
Last person you spoke to on the phone? Adam (when we were both in Best Buy)
How old are you today? 26 1/2
What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? Sports? college basketball (just the Illini really)
Have you ever dyed your hair? No but I'm considering it
Favorite food? Cheerios, Fried Mac n' Cheese
What is the last movie you watched? Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows!
Favorite day of the year? a perfect fall day, about 65 degrees :)
How do you vent anger? In the moment, I try to take deep breaths...then I run later or read a book to relax.
What was your favorite toy as a child? My popple or my dump truck
What is your favorite season? Fall
Cherries or Blueberries? Cherries
Living arrangements? Adam and I bought a house in May
When was the last time you cried? Twice today: when I threw up b/c of my migraine and watching Harry Potter, ha
What is on the floor of your closet? 2 pairs of boots and a laundry basket
What did you do last night? Hung out with Adam before he went to work and went to Walgreens
What are you most afraid of? Snakes, getting really depressed again
Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? Cheese
Favorite day of the week? Currently Friday b/c I have them off so they are the beginning of my weekend
How many states have you lived in? just Illinois
Diamonds or pearls? I would have to say diamonds, especially since getting married (they are just so sparkly!)
What is your favorite flower? I think gerber daisies are happy :)
What color are your socks right now? Pink with green bunnies that say "it's not my fault you're icky"
What are you listening to right now? National Treasure on TBS and Adam sleeping on the couch
What was the last thing that you ate? Rice and eggs (though I really want some candy)
Can you drive a stick shift? Not real well
Last person you spoke to on the phone? Adam (when we were both in Best Buy)
How old are you today? 26 1/2
What is your favorite sport to watch on TV? Sports? college basketball (just the Illini really)
Have you ever dyed your hair? No but I'm considering it
Favorite food? Cheerios, Fried Mac n' Cheese
What is the last movie you watched? Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows!
Favorite day of the year? a perfect fall day, about 65 degrees :)
How do you vent anger? In the moment, I try to take deep breaths...then I run later or read a book to relax.
What was your favorite toy as a child? My popple or my dump truck
What is your favorite season? Fall
Cherries or Blueberries? Cherries
Living arrangements? Adam and I bought a house in May
When was the last time you cried? Twice today: when I threw up b/c of my migraine and watching Harry Potter, ha
What is on the floor of your closet? 2 pairs of boots and a laundry basket
What did you do last night? Hung out with Adam before he went to work and went to Walgreens
What are you most afraid of? Snakes, getting really depressed again
Plain, cheese, or spicy hamburgers? Cheese
Favorite day of the week? Currently Friday b/c I have them off so they are the beginning of my weekend
How many states have you lived in? just Illinois
Diamonds or pearls? I would have to say diamonds, especially since getting married (they are just so sparkly!)
What is your favorite flower? I think gerber daisies are happy :)
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
no more drama
Wow, I'm tired of stress. I am ready for this semester to be over! We had Match Day on Thursday. It was the most emotional day ever. It was so dramatic and it felt like the longest day ever. They handed out our envelopes at 10:40 a.m. and we couldn't open them until 11:00 to find out the "big decision." It was just so emotionally draining and exciting to find out that we got our first choice. I am so proud of Adam! He got in to a top 10 ranked program in the US. The rest of the day was crazy and exciting with our friends. I found out that same day that I had an internship interview in Springfield for Monday so that was added drama because Adam then really wanted me to do my internship in St. Louis with him. Turns out I didn't get the internship in Springfield, so now I definitely have to start trying to get one in St. Louis. We have about 2 months to find somewhere to live, move, Adam to graduate, and me to finish 5 huge projects for school, while wrapping up my job. Who has time for all that while working full time because I sure don't?? My mom is super disappointed that I'm not moving home for 7 months too. She was really looking forward to stealing me for that time and planning the wedding with me. I hate feeling like I disappointed her and my dad but I am excited to start my new life in St. Louis too. Ahh, sometimes I wish I could be in 2 places at once because I miss how easy it is being at home sometimes with the family. I know it's not going to be easy in St. Louis once Adam starts working and has crazy hours. I know I'm going to get super lonely and I will probably start to actually miss school (ha! definitely never thought I would say that but it might happen). I also can't imagine being without Adam though. He is so sweet and funny (and currently making me a lemon pound cake!) and I love just being in the same space as him even if all he will be doing is sleeping when I see him.
Monday, March 15, 2010
panic attacks...
Wow, had my first panic attack last night in about 4 years! In the world of panic attacks it was just a baby, but it still kicked my butt. I'm really feeling it today too. I feel like I got punched in the stomach and I started to get a migraine in my am class. Yuck. It's crazy that I vividly remember my first panic attack my freshmen year of college after my grandpa died. I had them for a good four years after that but I haven't had one since 2006 (when Charlie told me he was moving to D.C.). Then last night I really starting freaking out about my internship after getting an email from my stupid adviser. Ugh.
So the School of Social Work made this huge deal of how I had to have all my paperwork (application, resume, etc.) turned in February 1st for my internship so they could start looking for placements. Well my adviser just called me last week and was like "yeah, I don't have any leads!" Um, wtf?? I'm supposed to start May 24th and I still don't have anywhere to go. If it took this damn long why couldn't I have waited to find out where Adam was going to be (on Thursday btw) and just tried to get a placement with him? They said that was impossible. March 18th was WAY too long to wait to set up an internship...yet it's March 15th today and I don't even have so much as an interview lined up. My adviser gave in the other day and said that I could start looking in either St. Louis or Madison after we find out where Adam is going if I don't get any interviews in Springfield but it's getting really late in the game now. Plus, I was kind of already planning on being home for 6 months to finish planning the wedding. Grr, I do not like this stress. Plus trying to finish midterms and ginormous projects on top of all this crap.
I am only freaking out a little bit about Match day on Thursday. It will be a huge relief to finally find out where we are going to be for the next 3-6 years. On the other hand, life has been so easy between Adam and I for the last 3 months. We have been so happy and stress free (other than me at times, ha). I feel like as soon as we find out where we are going, the axe comes down and we will be trying to find a place to live and jumping into stress mode. Okay, I am seriously not helping my stress level today. I am supposed to working on a midterm while on break at school. The weird part is that I am sitting on the second floor of Espresso Royale right now on campus :)
So the School of Social Work made this huge deal of how I had to have all my paperwork (application, resume, etc.) turned in February 1st for my internship so they could start looking for placements. Well my adviser just called me last week and was like "yeah, I don't have any leads!" Um, wtf?? I'm supposed to start May 24th and I still don't have anywhere to go. If it took this damn long why couldn't I have waited to find out where Adam was going to be (on Thursday btw) and just tried to get a placement with him? They said that was impossible. March 18th was WAY too long to wait to set up an internship...yet it's March 15th today and I don't even have so much as an interview lined up. My adviser gave in the other day and said that I could start looking in either St. Louis or Madison after we find out where Adam is going if I don't get any interviews in Springfield but it's getting really late in the game now. Plus, I was kind of already planning on being home for 6 months to finish planning the wedding. Grr, I do not like this stress. Plus trying to finish midterms and ginormous projects on top of all this crap.
I am only freaking out a little bit about Match day on Thursday. It will be a huge relief to finally find out where we are going to be for the next 3-6 years. On the other hand, life has been so easy between Adam and I for the last 3 months. We have been so happy and stress free (other than me at times, ha). I feel like as soon as we find out where we are going, the axe comes down and we will be trying to find a place to live and jumping into stress mode. Okay, I am seriously not helping my stress level today. I am supposed to working on a midterm while on break at school. The weird part is that I am sitting on the second floor of Espresso Royale right now on campus :)
Sunday, March 14, 2010
I'm going to start blogging again...
I've decided it's time to start blogging again. This idea occurred to me when I came across my livejournal account from over 2 years ago the other day. Wow, a lot has changed since 2007. The last post I had on livejournal was after Charlie and I had broken up and I was finally starting to pick up the pieces of my life again. I hadn't started dating again yet, but I was starting to feel better again. I'm glad that things are going a lot better than that now :)
I guess whenever I feel the need to write, it means that something is going on though. Nothing is particularly 'wrong' in my life right now, but I am definitely about to undergo a transitional period. In a matter of days, Adam and I find out where we will be living for the next 3-6 years. We also find out where all of our med school friends will be moving (fully knowing that most of them are opting to move out of state). I am also feeling very stressed about my upcoming internship for school. It is supposed to start May 24th and I still have no clue where I am doing it. My adviser was supposed to have helped me line it up already but she is basically an idiot.
I'm obviously also planning the wedding. I don't feel particularly stressed about that yet, but I feel like I should be doing more for it. I've also had 2 weird wedding dreams already. In the first, I was so excited to put on my wedding dress and when I opened the box, my wedding dress was fuchsia! Then last night, I had a dream that I showed up at the wedding ceremony and everyone was all stressed out and asking me why I hadn't planned the decorations for the reception yet. They then told me that the only option for the reception was purple candles because I took too long to decide (when the wedding colors are wine and orange). That dream makes me kind of worry that I already have these weird thoughts and concerns in my head and we are way too far out for that to be starting!
I guess whenever I feel the need to write, it means that something is going on though. Nothing is particularly 'wrong' in my life right now, but I am definitely about to undergo a transitional period. In a matter of days, Adam and I find out where we will be living for the next 3-6 years. We also find out where all of our med school friends will be moving (fully knowing that most of them are opting to move out of state). I am also feeling very stressed about my upcoming internship for school. It is supposed to start May 24th and I still have no clue where I am doing it. My adviser was supposed to have helped me line it up already but she is basically an idiot.
I'm obviously also planning the wedding. I don't feel particularly stressed about that yet, but I feel like I should be doing more for it. I've also had 2 weird wedding dreams already. In the first, I was so excited to put on my wedding dress and when I opened the box, my wedding dress was fuchsia! Then last night, I had a dream that I showed up at the wedding ceremony and everyone was all stressed out and asking me why I hadn't planned the decorations for the reception yet. They then told me that the only option for the reception was purple candles because I took too long to decide (when the wedding colors are wine and orange). That dream makes me kind of worry that I already have these weird thoughts and concerns in my head and we are way too far out for that to be starting!
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